I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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