How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
