Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
