I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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