If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Bring me that man meat
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
