You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize