Apparently you make a good broom.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
