dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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