She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
