First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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