Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
ttyl tear gas
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
