im about as happy as oj after his trial
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
