I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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