it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
