Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
