Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
