She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
home. puking in laundry basket.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
