when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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