so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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