Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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