is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Someone signed my nipple.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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