Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I can't put those talents on a resume
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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