This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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