I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
