Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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