Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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