One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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