shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize