And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
