you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
