? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Randomize