I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize