I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize