You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
