Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
