So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
