is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
