I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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