Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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