I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
