Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
