i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
