were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
