so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
