she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
