We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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