I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
