i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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