Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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