I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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